I am a 22-year-old married woman. My husband and I live with my mother-in-law and she is always giving me a headache. She loves competing for his son’s attention with me. Sometimes I feel she is too controlling. I know it’s not easy for my husband who loves his mother and me as well but I just don’t know what to do.

She makes sure that she talks and talks with his son until late at night and I am always feeling lonely in the bedroom. The only time I spend with my husband is in the evening since we will both be at work but when we are both home my mother-in-law also wants some quality time with him. I don’t want to make my husband chose between me and her but I am just left with no choice. What can a woman do in such a situation really? - Tracey

Dear Tracey

I am sorry for this situation. Do not give up on your marriage dear one. Your mother-in-law is facing one of the biggest problems mothers face - letting go. She needs to let go of her son and accept he is no longer the little boy who she needs to look after. Her boy is now a man with a wife to take care of, though she will always deserve his respect and care.

Asking your husband to choose between the two of you will be unfair to him. You obviously know he loves you both. You just need to be open with him and tell him how you feel. You both need some quality time to enjoy your marriage. You need to understand where your mother-in-law’s jealousy is coming from. She was probably the only woman in his life for a long time. She needs to understand that her son needs to move on with you and start his own family.

Living with in-laws is not easy. But to make both of them happy give your in-law time to let go. At the same time let your husband know that you need time with him too. You did not get married to be lonely. Communicate with your husband. - Gracey